Things have taken a 180 degree turn since the last time I wrote.
I gave in and we made up shortly after the last entry.
We just came back from an amazing, well deserved and well spent holiday.
I started making time to spend some quiet time with God at the start of every day after we made up. I didn't realize how dry and hungry my heart and soul was for the Lord's word until I started reading the passages. Being able to continue spending such quiet time during our holiday was truly God's grace. I use 2 different daily guides and I am still amazed at how the same message runs through both guides every day.
My relationship with my husband has also improved. I pray that it will get better.
Whatever doubts I had about my marriage and my feelings for my husband I submit them to God's will daily as I read His word. It is actually quite liberating to pray for His will to be done and His purpose for me and us to be fulfilled and not dwell on things I don't know and have not control over.
I pray that this is not just a phase like so many other attempts I have made in the past. I need to remember that I shouldn't rely on my own strength and understanding. That's a sure way to loose steam and become discouraged.
2.00am
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